Let’s get real about progesterone suppositories

Ok people this post has been on my mind since ending the PiO shots and starting the vaginal suppositories. This little guy:


Is a vaginal suppository of progesterone. You take the oblong pill, tuck it in the applicator, and insert it up your lady bits. Naturally, as your body heats up the pill it starts to melt in the most unforgiving kind of way and it’s like having a progesterone period without the cramping. Now multiply that times taking it three times a day and you have yourself an equation for needing to use the restroom every couple of hours. Aside from the fact that I’m basically in the bathroom every few hours to change out a panty liner and really uncomfortable moments at work, it also means no sex, no swimming, and having to wear panty liners 24/7- god I can’t wait until I don’t have to wear underwear to sleep again! But the worst part about using these is the initial smell when you open the blasted foil that holds the suppository. It smells like a skunk. Now think about that for a moment. I just finished 80-some shots to the ass, after all of the countless shots to the stomach, after my fet, after my egg retrieval, after all of my blood tests and other invasive procedures and tests, after thinking I was miscarrying, after finding out our only option for having a healthy kid was IVF…. and it smells like a freaking skunk; that’s not even talking about the fact that it’s a flat oblong pill that doesn’t exactly go in smoothly. I swear it had to be constructed by a man. No self respecting woman would do that to another woman. Ok my rant is over(ish). 

What’s more concerning is that my RE gave instructions to just stop all of my meds after tomorrow. No titrating the dosages down, no other plan other than to just stop. I get that you can do that with certain medications but I did some web searching and it seems pretty split as to people who are dosed down and people who stop cold turkey. The people who stop cold turkey seem to have some bleeding/spotting after stopping- that’s terrifying. And the people that are dosed down seem to be on it forever- also terrifying. So here I am, just waiting to see what happens. I still have the fear of miscarrying and I’m still on weight restrictions and no sex and no working out and no anything fun really, for the remainder of my first trimester. Now if I could just not be scared that would be great. 

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